I should add that I know the fear is coming, cue “dun-dunt dun-dunt dun-dunt” a-la Jaws. I can smell it, it’s not far off. When it does come, I really hope I can feel the fear and do it anyway, and not panic in the water while getting eaten alive. This morning I feel like life is swallowing me up. There are so many changes ahead and I am not sure that I can climb all of the hills on this huge journey. A journey ending and beginning in a simple place where life is hard and I will be forced to learn a new way doing almost everything. I’m a little angry that God would ask so much of me, and I am telling him just that, despite the fact that it sounds really selfish coming out of my mouth.
I still feel the truth of what I wrote yesterday.
We are made for this, meant for this.
Today I don’t want it.
Today it feels like too much.
Today I am getting away.
Time to think, breathe, evaluate, get refreshed, get out of town.
Rediscover a woman with strength.
Remember women who have gone before me.
Rest.
Un-think.
Re-think.
Refresh.
Bye.
Luv,
me
